How come?

I can get up before 9, make love with MLI, have cuddles with the girls, get breakfast, shower, dress, do the food shopping (in three stages), bake cupcakes, visit friends, go swimming, watch Animal Farm, ponder the capitalist vs communist problem, plus what I will write on my wedding invitations, make chickpea and pumpkin tagine, and an 18 ingredient caponata plus 15 fish fingers, rice for three days and steamed veges, clean up the bomb that is the kitchen after my experimentation, do the usual evening routine with the girls, and yet...

and yet...

AND YET...

I still get my arsed whipped at memory?