I'm going to scratch some bitch's eyes out

Last night my netball team had their inaugural game. Oh dear. We are quite the disappointment.
Namely, WE WERE THRASHED.
However, the game brought back all of those wonderful memories of my teenage netball antics.
So for the girls in particular - can you recognise any of these snippets of recollection?

"Ok girls, nail check please"

"Just behind if you need"

"step"

"Penalty Goal Attack breaking"

"Go team"

"Contact Goal Defense"

"no food and drink on the court please"

"you will have to cover up that nose ring dear"

The thing is, we are playing at a very hardcore Netball centre against 17 year old girls who mean BUSINESS. Our team are 25+ drinkers, smokers and rock and rollers.

I'm terrified for my life.