Milestone at a marriage

Well I'm off to the country this weekend to attend a rock and roll wedding.

The dress is perfect
The shoes are perfect
The bag is perfect
The underwear is perfect
The jewellery is perfect

I'm broke.

I plan to have a lot of sex, drink wine, get in the jacuzzi, take fancypants and avoid the parentals if possible.

I will be meeting

5 siblings including THE SISTERS
and their partners.
4 cousins
and their partners
and 7 aunts and uncles
10 of the bestest friends - luckily most have met me in various states of sobriety.
THE PARENTS - well not technically - they did get a 5 minute teeth and haunches check about 3 weeks ago.

I'm scared of THE SISTERS. In fact I'm a little petrified of THE SISTERS.
Why?
NLI had a bit of a rough time with his last partner so I can envisage this happening.




"Bitch - don't you fuck with my brother or I'm going to pinch your nipples til you scream".




But, perhaps that is my imagination getting away from me.

Wish me luck.